Sveltly off the injured list

. . . and taking this opportunity to plug my next book


Sorry it’s taken me so long to let everyone know how much I enjoyed the Anni Book. Peter Besas really did a job. It’s beautiful! And thanx, Pete, for running my stuff — not just one, but two pieces! And for mentioning me in your speech at Sardi’s.

I really regretted not being there. I still do — especially after my buddy Doug Galloway came home and gave me the book and told me about the event from his POV. He said he had more fun there than he’d had in weeks. Which for him is quite a statement. Believe me, Duggles is a pro at it; he has fun 24-7, even when he sleeps. (Especially when he sleeps, actually.)

Me? I’m fine. Take me off the “Ill ‘n’ Injured” list. The surgery is behind me now — in more ways than one — and I feel great. Also, I’m svelte again. (Funny, I always thought “svelte” was a Jewish word, like “kvetch” till I looked it up.)

I lost about 50 pounds and I don’t miss a single one of them. Sure, I don’t move as fast as I used to but what World War II vet does at age 59? Come on, admit it. You guys have got to be as old as I am, if not older, for God’s sake!

Which brings me to the subject of my new novel, For God’s Sake! Sure, it’s a sneaky way to get a plug in, but why not?

It’s a hellava book. I wrote it about eight years ago and couldn’t sell it. Why? Because all it was was a lousy first draft and I was too stupid to see it. It needed a major rewrite, page for page, which I’m giving it now.

I’m about two-thirds done and should be finished by Xmas time. It’ll be in the stores by the end of ’06 selling for $25.95 a copy and will be a socco smashit. How can I be so sure? Simple. It’s all about sex and religion.

Thanks to everyone for thinking of me – and yes, I’m taking good care of Abel’s ashtray.